Day 32: "Vous-êtes combien ?" "une!" *contains lots of swears*

Hello My Lovelies,


needless to say that my situation did not improve much. Still a (fake)Love/Hate relationship between me and the family, but I'm ready if anything comes I'm ready to talk back and not take it in anymore. If I had a job and a place to stay already I'd be even more ready to talk back. I definitely gotta find something. On saturday me and edie are probably going to this centre where they help the youth to find jobs and flats, we're hoping for a miracle. 


This week has been alright so far, tomorrow and friday I have the busiest days for this week so this "alright" might turn into a horrible or beautiful (yea right). School is going pretty well, I'm trying to force myself not to ask if a waiter, shop keeper or person, knows english but I'll just try and feckkk I just remembered I gotta finish... eh...start my homework. OK short moment of panic, I'm done now xD Yea kinda "live feed" blogging. Anyway I'm trying to force myself to actually use the things I'm learning in class otherwise I'll forget everything the second I leave the school.  


Today I went to Disneyland to finally get my annual passport, and unlike last time I got a really kind and british lady :) It's so nice to have smiley cast members from time to time !! You got some people's dream jobs, for fuck's sake, be proud ! Anyway 199€ euro later I was on my way in to the Passeport Annuel Office inside the park :) Already on my way there I caught a show, a dancey one, no clue what was going on but I filmed it... you never know when you might need to know the choreography ;) Anyway inside the office it was very comfy, there were nice chairs where you could watch a movie, Ratatouille this time, and the queue was very quick !! I was really smiley and happy all day, the cast member that then gave me my permanent passport took a picture of me with a webcam, on the screen the pic looked alright on the passport... meh... oh well xD next to my photo there's Rapunzel so it makes it look cute xD
Oh I forgot, as soon as I stepped out of the metro and into the park frontyard, HM called "are you upstairs?" "ehhh darling no, you gave me the day off, I asked yesterday evening if you where sure that I was free and you said yes and I'm on the opposite side of Paris, so now go and fuck off..." but of course I did not say that cause I'm a fucking actress and said no I'm not upstairs and not around, I'm not stupid ! 
Anyway inside the park then I didn't quite know what to do... it's pretty awkward to be there alone, thank god I had my camera with me so I looked like I was working on something of for someone, and my professional canon made me look like I was good at taking pics so people randomly asked me 3 times to take pics of them, with their camera of course xD
I only did 2 rides, the phantom manor and the star tours, all in all I didn't enjoy my day as much as I planned, mainly because I have this nagging "fear" in my neck that is my HM, the fact that I had to be home at 7 aargh everything and also me being alone. I can do whatever I want then but in the end it's pretty not boring but awkward. I went to a restaurant... ever realised how silly "Table for one" sounds ? Yea... ever realised how silly it looks ? Then I had a very nice waitress who kept giving me the "You can't afford this" look, which was ridiculous !!! I had a 3 course meal for 32€ which is nothing, considering I paid 15€ for a horrible pizza at the Champs Elysees. 
As soon as I was done I went outside and sat on the curb as the parade was about to begin, I so wish my mam was there with me... I missed her comments; but being alone made me see so many things, I want to be a dancer/princess/character there so I looked at how my "future colleagues" worked and well, the dances aren't too hard imo, I did worse. The princes and princesses though were pretty uhm... disapointing kind of. Now I don't know what day those people had but those smiles were so fake, I mean it's just a 30 minute show, show some more passion, again with the "You got some people's dream jobs, for fuck's sake, be proud !" the only one I really liked (maybe I'm biased though) was Belle, she and her prince looked very real and passionate which was amazing ^_^


On my metro back I almost fell asleep, which was horrible, some people actually do that but I'm too scared to miss my stop which is pretty common for me -__-° 
Later the evening work and laundry and now I'm writing this... 
and now.. I'm going to bed :)


Talk to you soon.
Love
Julie x


PS: My latest blabber :)